The Crunchwrap by Adam Chandler

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Postcard From New Hampshire

thecrunchwrap.substack.com

Postcard From New Hampshire

Plus Chorizo cosmos and Almond Butter Bacon

Adam Chandler
Aug 7, 2022
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Postcard From New Hampshire

thecrunchwrap.substack.com

Hi Friends,

Welcome back to The Crunchwrap. A cherished part of the newsletter industrial complex is the Great Mid-to-Late Summer Phone In.™

If you’re a subscriber to enough newsletters — even fancy paid ones with reliable publishing schedules — you may notice that this is the time of year when writers just kind of fling some empty calorie content at you. (Here’s some music I liked! What are some of YOUR summer memories? Five memes about Beyoncé’s Renaissance. This is a links-only recommendation edition!).

Well, here at The Crunchwrap, we’re not above such pre-autumnal lollygagging. So this week, and through August, while I’m on the road doing some reporting (and “reporting”), I’m gonna drop the pretense of a loaded Crunchwrap newsletter in favor of a few Crunchwrap Lites. Please clap and/or forgive me.

Phone It In Postcard: American Legion Post 59

New Hampshire is a picturesque state. But I pulled off the road in Hillsboro because I loved this local American Legion post’s road sign. To supplement its income, the Post also had its commissary dishing out buffalo wings on Tuesday nights and throwing fish frys on Fridays.

When I went in on wing night the cafeteria was empty because all the legionnaires were next door at the canteen drinking. (Fair enough.) I asked the host at the canteen if I could drop in, meet some of the crew, talk about our decaying civic institutions, or maybe grab a $3 Bud. She kindly-but-firmly let me know that it’s members only.


Phone It In Snack of the Week: Almond Butter Bacon

This week, The Crunchwrap Wrap Kitchen put some bacon on the grill for BLTs. Grilling bacon is a great way to keep your house cool and your pork-crazed dog sane. It also cooks hella quick. Contrary to some Reddit threads, you must lay them on a metal skillet or some aluminum foil (as I did) or else you will have crazy flare-ups.

Anyhow, left with an extra piece of bacon (beyond the bit I fed to the dog), I was assembling my BLT in front of a marked-down tub of local almond butter and thought, why not? WHY NOT, ADAM? LIVE A LITTLE, JEEZ.

I endorse Almond Butter Bacon.


Phone It In Hero of the Week: Etienne Klein

Earlier this week, a well-renowned French physicist (is there any other kind?) tweeted this stunning image of the universe from the James Webb Space Telescope:

Twitter avatar for @EtienneKlein
Etienne KLEIN @EtienneKlein
Photo de Proxima du Centaure, l’étoile la plus proche du Soleil, située à 4,2 année-lumière de nous. Elle a été prise par le JWST. Ce niveau de détails… Un nouveau monde se dévoile jour après jour.
Image
3:33 PM ∙ Jul 31, 2022
18,922Likes3,342Retweets

Later in the week, however, Klein had to apologize because rather than being an image of the cosmos at play, it was actually just a slice of chorizo against a black backdrop.

Klein’s explanation: “Well, when it's cocktail hour, cognitive bias seem to find plenty to enjoy... Beware of it. According to contemporary cosmology, no object related to Spanish charcuterie exists anywhere else other than on Earth.”


That’s it for this week! Thanks for reading!

Please say hello and send any music recs, summer memories, Beyoncé memes, or links my way.

Love,

Adam

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Postcard From New Hampshire

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